Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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