nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
operation harelip BJ is a go
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
