so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
