Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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