I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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