My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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