sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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