Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize