Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I wish there were birth control emojis
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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