there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Randomize
