Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
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