I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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