I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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