Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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