'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... ๐ฏ๐๐๐
Do I even want to know?
Stop saving videos when youโre using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks Iโm into that
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