Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I have peed in a lot of sinks
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
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