1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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