farters have to be the big spoon...
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
you didnt know i had herpes?
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Randomize
