There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Randomize
