new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
