Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize