Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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