Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize