I'm lost and stupid without you.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
