it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
