are you still at the devil's house?
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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