Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
