I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
