the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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