I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
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