My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
