Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
