called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
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