i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
