so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
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