I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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