To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
literally had 100 drinks last night.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
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it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
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Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.