The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
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