Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
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He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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