your room smells of hookers.
And success
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
