how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
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