we're blogging at a bar
I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Sorry about my life...
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
