If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
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There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
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Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.