no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
