So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Randomize
