Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Randomize
