David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
