I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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