everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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