Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
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