Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
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